


the types of love

by poludeuces



Category: Fate/Grand Order
Genre: F/F, Other, excessive use of metaphors about love, i wanted soft.... so i made soft, kama uses they/them pronouns so yeah, references to kama's punishment and use of drowning and fire imagery, some references to ooku i guess??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:40:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26360536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poludeuces/pseuds/poludeuces
Summary: kama understood love.it's destruction and pain.but... they do not understand this type of love.
Relationships: Kama | Assassin/Fujimaru Ritsuka
Comments: 6
Kudos: 37





	the types of love

**Author's Note:**

> some things:
> 
> \- use of drowning and fire imagery. if this is triggering for you maybe not.. read  
> \- kama uses they/them pronouns  
> \- some references to ooku if you squint?  
> \- dabs

What is love?

They knew the scorching like lightning. It ran up their arms and down their legs to strike the hearts of their admirers. They knew the spontaneity, the sudden charm, the pinprick of the arrow to the back of the neck as the God of Love’s arrow struck home. They understood the flash in the pan, the spark of light, before it fizzled away into nothing. How the feelings would ebb away as quickly as they had arrived, revealing contempt and anger, the tiny details that would add up and show a completely new person than the one you had fallen in love with.

They understood the love like the ocean, that held you up if you spread your arms out to float. They knew the diving board, toes curling against the edge, worried about the feeling of hitting the water. They knew the feeling of the waves crashing over you, dragging you down deep, drowning you, overwhelming your senses. As you fall, you open your eyes, and in the depths you come face to face with the beast that resides in your heart.

They knew the overwhelming feeling of being close. The entangling of limbs, the hot breath, the feeling of love surrounding their admirer for the night. They recognize the lust in their eyes, the look right before succumbing to their charms. They could multiply and overpower if they so choose, covering them head-to-toe with their forms, but how many times did it take before that became boring?

A single shot to the heart was all that was necessary. Their bow had become an extension of their arm. Love this way was simple, matchmaking by the will of the Gods. They were by definition a pawn then, a practitioner of love to be destroyed when things went awry. They had simply been doing what was required of them, why punish love?

They recognized the fire, the way it enveloped them. It wasn’t a hug but tearing heat. It clawed up their arms as they punished them.

They understood the emptiness of space. Constellations adorned their hair and decorated their fingers. They remember floating out in the void, their heart closed, their body tucked in close. Perhaps, if they stayed here forever, they would not be punished again. 

What is love?

What is the use of love?

They understood the pain of love. The flashes, the quick descent, the contempt and the anger and the punishment. Love was nothing but something fabricated.

They did not understand this.

“Hey Kama,” their master sits on the bed in front of them. Her hair is like that fire, dazzling red, curling at the tips as it spreads out. “Can I…” She’s blushing and playing with her skirt. “Could I maybe rest my head on your lap?”

Kama raises an eyebrow. Today they have chosen to present in their more feminine form - simply a random fancy, nothing more. They know that their current state of dress is not the reason for their master’s blush, Ritsuka blushes when they are in their male form as well. It is an expression Kama is familiar with at this point, having spent over a year with this mortal.

They are confused by this human. They expected love - it is nigh impossible for someone to gaze upon them without their charms enveloping them in feelings. Kama is used to being the subject of admiration by this point. But love is a flash, a lightning strike, a tsunami’s wave - sudden, crashing down, before dissipating and leaving chaos.

This love they do not understand.

Why do they continue to vy for them for so long? Are there not other lovers for them to fawn over by now? Are there not stronger heroes to spend days and nights with? Are there not powerful Gods, more important than they, to dispense love for?

Kama sighs and shakes their head, “If you so wish.” They float down so they sit next to Ritsuka. She appears to be shaking in anticipation, or is it fear? Kama rolls their eyes, “I will not smite you, just get along with it.”

She quickly scuttles so she can lay down and rest her head on their lap. Her hair spreads out like a lotus blossoms, cascading over her lap. Her bangs brush over her eyes - something that won’t do. Their universal hand reaches down and brushes them away from her eyes. Ritsuka smiles up at her in response.

“You’re gorgeous, Kama,” she tells them.

“Shush,” Kama taps her cheek, “I thought you wanted to rest.”

Ritsuka quickly closes her eyes and nods, “Thank you, Kama.”

They hold the need to roll their eyes once again, their hand hovering over their master’s face. It would be so simple for them to notch an arrow, for them to multiply and overwhelm them in love, but…

Instead their hand goes back down and cups her face softly. They are but a weapon for them - they will notch their arrow for her enemies, not for her. That form of love only causes destruction. 

This love is different. It is the quiet of simple glances that mean a thousand words. It is the comforting of a slow night in. It is the uneventful passing of days that feel both like years and minutes. It is the remembering of tiny details that you love about them, their likes and dislikes. It is about the Good Mornings and the Sweet Dreams, the Have your Eatens and the How are you feelings? 

It is comforting, like the warmth of a contained fire on a cold night.

They slowly begin to brush her hair with her fingers.

And she wishes to learn more of this type of love.

**Author's Note:**

> me: types what is love  
> my brain: baby don't hurt me
> 
> tumblr/twitter: @avicebro


End file.
